Sept. 11

10 years ago today... was live changing, not only for those that lost many people, or those that saved lives or were injured. It was also was life changing for the entire USA.

I've heard many times today that we should celebrate and while we've made a comeback from that attack it's still quite a somber day. So many people have horrible memories. It's really still something to mourn about.

Each year I hear and see people recall exactly where they were when they heard about the towers being hit. I remember, not only where I was, but where I was supposed to be.

Sept. 11, 2001 was a tuesday, and I was 15 years old. Therefore I was a sophomore in high school. I should have been at school, in my history class when news about the attacks reached the ears and eyes of people in my school. Instead however I was at home.

In Sept. 2001 my father was dying of cancer. On the morning of the 11th my mother was angry, she was angry about the fact that we all knew dad didnt have much longer with us. So that morning she woke me up and started yelling at me. School was a safe haven to me at this point, it was an escape from my imprisoned life at home, so I enjoyed it. I loved weekdays and dreaded weekends. But my mother decided that I was to stay home on the 11th of Sept. 2001. She had yelled at my dad and me and my dad and I took comfort in each other as I spent the day cleaning my room and helping mom around the house. Suddenly my grandfather called mom and told her to turn on the tv. I was standing by my dad, giving him a drink, and about to empty his pee bottles, when my mom turned on the tv and we saw what was on the news.

The entire day we couldnt change the channel, we were glued to the tv. Mom had calmed down and our family seemed to be closer throughout the day. At 9 pm that night my father said goodnight to us, the last thing he watched on tv was the terrorist attacks, the next morning I awoke, eager to join my friends at school, but my mother was frantic, she begged me to come in and wake dad up, he wouldnt wake up for her. I ran to dad's side...that morning, sept 12th of 2001 I found my father in a coma. We called an ambulance and got dad to the hospital. He was having leg spasms. The doctors, nurses and my mom couldnt get his leg to stop moving. Finally, I came to my dad and talked to him, I told him the leg movement was scaring me and I put his leg back down. The leg spasms stopped.

The rest of that day, they moved him to a hospice room...then the tv was turned on. Once again my family was glued to the tv watching for more news about the attacks. I sat by my dad, talking to him, singing to him, and even playing thumb war with him, letting him win. My small teenage mind couldnt imagine not letting him win, it would make the situation seem too real. The next day mom and I went back home to pack more clothes...then mom went to talk to people at the funeral home...

That night, Sept 13th 2001 my father passed away after a 7 month battle with cancer. The following months are a blur to me now, and even 10 years later those memories that I just told you about are the clearest of all. Sept. 11th 2001 has a different meaning to me than it does to others. My heart still breaks but I'm thankful my father is a better place...even though I do miss him so much.

Praying for those people to day that were directly effected by 9/11.

God bless.