Convictions and Gluten Trouble

Brace yourselves, this is going to be a long one!

A lot has been going on this past weekend. I'll start off by talking about the gluten thing. I have no doubt in my mind that I'm now Celiac instead of Gluten sensitive/intolerant. I used to be able to handle small amounts and now I can't even handle a small piece of communion bread. It's nightmarish.

With this sudden, abrupt, and difficult change in my diet, others in my circle are having to also adjust, but many in my circle havent received it well. I've been judged and glared out. People don't appreciate that I HAVE to bring my own gluten free option to community dinners. I have to take care of myself so that I'm not feeling deprived. Depression can often come with ANY TYPE of change in diet and I really don't appreciate people telling me I'm in the wrong or that it's MY DUTY to help others see a healthier way of eating. I cannot and will not carry the  whole worlds burdens on my shoulders, I have enough going on in my own world, too much of my own world to defend against the judgmental glances of others.

How would you feel if you had an allergy and you knew no one else would bring something gluten free so you had to, then when you did people were rude to you about it?! Probably not too happy. But you know what, I'm getting through it and it's all fine. I just said that to say, be careful who you judge and why you judge. It's not our place.

Next... I'm very open and honest about my personal convictions, we ALL have personal convictions. These are convictions God puts on our hearts personally. Other people may not get them or understand them but YOU do, because it's YOURS. I have always been a person that has looked to God for guidance in everything including convictions he's already placed on my heart. I ALWAYS listen to what God has to say but I do not listen to people when they tell me they don't agree with my convictions. A. They don't understand it. B. It's none of their business.

One of my biggest convictions, that was actually confirmed by more than one of my college professors is that I will not volunteer in a youth ministry or childrens ministry. I got a degree in it, and I will not volunteer because if I ever get a job in it, that should be my lively hood and volunteering will more often then not get me stuck in a bigger rut than I'm already in. In good conscience I cannot do that. You may not agree with it, but it's not about you.

Now, that being said, that does not mean I do not mentor young people. There are several young people in my church and outside of my church that look up to me. Young women who consider me their mentor.

I made a point recently that God does call some people to volunteer, but he doesn't call everyone to volunteer. This was shot back with the comment "he calls everyone to serve" Serving and volunteering are different. I don't volunteer in youth ministries but I serve in other ways. I serve in my churches technology team, I serve by mentoring young people, I serve by teaching Bible Study when I'm healthy enough to have it in my home.

But I will not stand to be interrupted and judged (even unintentionally) by someone who wont even listen. When you don't give me a chance to explain without jumping to conclusions don't expect me to just take it without getting upset. I took classes on preaching I know what it looks and sounds like and I will not let you tell me my conviction is wrong when you don't know my PERSONAL relationship with God. Just like I wont tell you how to live your life for Christ.

Rant over. Just...be careful.